stereotypical single woman

When I was 18 I was diagnosed as hypothyroid. It came as no surprise, there’s a long history of thyroid problems in my family. It’s completely treatable and I started taking Synthroid right away so I never really felt the symptoms at that point int my life. However about a two years ago I had money problems - my budget was so tight that I couldn’t afford the extra 13 dollars per month for my prescription, let alone the money for the bloodwork that has to get done every year (damn HMOs and their unreasonable copays.) I stopped taking my daily dose of Synthroid. I thought everything would be fine. I did my research and found out that it takes decades of being untreated for the disease to kill you. Sure, my goiter was going to get bigger and I’d gain a little bit of weight, but I’d deal with it. Idealistic and naive person that I am, I wasn’t at all prepared to deal with how this was going to affect my life.

Your thyroid gland controls your metabolism. Your metabolism controls every function of your body. If your metabolism isn’t working properly your body isn’t either. I was constantly run down. I was depressed - I would start crying and not know why. I became a hermit - I could sense that my friends knew I was acting strange so I stayed away from them, not wanting to bring them down by my prescence. I could go for a day without eating and not even realize it (I know - some anorexics claim this too, but I lost no weight, I simply had no appetite at all.) I started having to use Metamucil on a daily basis. I couldn’t keep warm, even with multiple layers of clothing. I had problems concentrating. I became very pale, even in the summer. But I was scared of the doctor yelling at me for going off my medication so even when I had dug myself out of the financial hole I was in I still didn’t go back to get a prescription.

About five weeks ago I finally sucked it up and made an appointment. My new doctor was very nice. I am amazed at the changes in myself. I can wake up, refreshed, on less than 10 hours of sleep. Getting my ass out the door in the morning doesn’t take nearly as long as it once did. I’m much happier, if still introverted and shy (I have a feeling that’s never going to change.) I actually get hungry again, to the point of having hunger pains (so much for losing weight once I got back on the drugs.) No more Metamucil! I’m still cold, but it’s February in Michigan, that’s expected. All in all - I hadn’t realized how run down I had been until I started feeling better again.

What did I learn from this failed experiment? 1)doctors prescribe medication for a reason, you need it, so take it dumbass. 2)doctors aren’t as scary as I thought they’d be. 3)Don’t fuck with your thyroid, because it fights back, and it’s mean. Also, if anyone out there is reading this and is just feeling run down - go see your doctor and have them run a blood test to check your TSH levels. The symptoms vary from person to person and the disease is often misdiagnosed as something else or just written off as signs of stress or aging; unless you specifically ask to have it checked the odds are great that it won’t be. It will make a world of difference in how you feel and your quality of life.